


The X Sickness X Within

by Rennwolf



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Adventure, Angst, BUT ALSO HAPPY, Fighting Crime, Justice, Killugon - Freeform, Lung Cancer, M/M, goodluck, slight leopika
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-17
Updated: 2016-11-13
Packaged: 2018-04-15 03:28:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 15,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4591278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rennwolf/pseuds/Rennwolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gon and Killua make their way to the doctors office after Killua begins to show signs of illness. They hope for the best, but sometimes, life gives you the worst.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer- Don't own Hunter X Hunter. If I did I wouldn't have left the fandom hanging like SOMEONE we know.

Chapter 1

Killua and Gon make their way unhappily to the doctor's office.

Killua was unhappy because Gon had forced him to come to the doctor's office with him after he had developed a persistent cough that wouldn't go away and he had been unable to breathe and passed out. Killua had no idea why that had happened but he was in no way sick. He couldn't be. He had been trained to be immune to practically every poison known to man and his body was trained to fight off sickness, so Killua just didn't see the point in visiting the doctor.

Gon was unhappy because Killua had been so reluctant to come and he was afraid for his friend. What if Killua was sick, that would mean that whatever was ailing his friend was very serious. Gon had finally convinced his friend to come after threatening not to go on any missions with him until they knew what was wrong.

There was a slight drizzle of rain and the sun seemed reluctant to come out from its blanket of clouds. The air was cool but not cold, but the tireless wind made it feel more like freezing. The sound of thunder echoed in the distance. Both of the boys shivered at the depressing weather.

The sharp, and overwhelming sterilized smell of cleaning materials wafted to Gon's sharp nose before he had even made it to the large glass doors. It made him scrunch up his nose and breathe lightly through his mouth.

After Gon checked in with the front desk he sat by Killua in front of the fish tanks. Gon went on to happily name each of the species of fish, their origin, and their eating habits, trying to lighten the mood between them. Killua was silently looking down at his feet. Any stranger who had to guess why would say Killua was mad at his friend and that was the reason he wasn't speaking to him, but Gon knew better.

Killua was afraid.

He was afraid that it wouldn't be just some freak accident that only occurs once in a life time. Killua was afraid that he was sick, ill, unwell. Just the thought that his body was infected by some kind of disease made him shiver and move on to another thought quickly. And although it was highly unlikely, Killua was afraid that while he was sick Gon would go on adventures without him. He was afraid that his best friend would leave him behind and not return because he was weak. Killua didn't know how wrong he was.

The cheerful nurse opened the door to the waiting room and called out a name. Collins. Killua and Gon stood and made their way over to the nurse. Though Killua's last name wasn't Collins it was the name he used when necessary. He couldn't exactly use his real last name because he was from a family of assassins and he didn't like having to explain to everyone, every time that he was no longer a part of that family.

When they entered Gon noticed that there were no windows in the small four walled room. A sink and green counter occupied one side of the room, and an examination table on the other. Two dark blue chairs resided on the third side and door rested in the last wall. The walls were white-washed and plain without a hint of dirt, the only color in the entire room was that of the counter and chairs.

Gon took a chair and Killua took a seat on the examination table. The nurse looked in the back of his throat, in his ears and nose, and took his temperature. She then began to check his breathing with her stethoscope. She made a face when Killua's ragged breathe in turned into a violent fit of coughs and wrote something down on her nurse's sheet. She gathered her things and left hurriedly after saying the doctor would be in shortly.

The look and rapid notes the nurse took made Killua even more nervous and fearful than before and he looked away from Gon, finding a sudden interest in the ceiling above him. Trying to hide his feelings, and to the untrained eye, succeeding.

Though the nurse had made Killua nervous, she had frightened Gon possibly more than Killua. What was wrong with his best friend? How could he make his friend better? Even though Gon had many friends and loved all of them, Killua was different. Killua was on a level with his Aunt Mito, who was practically the only family he had left. After all, he was the first and only friend that Gon had his age, which in turn meant that Killua understood him best. Gon's stomach twisted in anticipation as they waited for the doctor to come in.  
"Alright boys." The doctor said as he entered a few minutes later. "I'm going to ask you a few questions and I want you to answer truthfully." Silver and black hair bobbed simultaneously.

"How long have you had a cough?"

"A week or two." Killua answered.

"A month or two." Gon corrected.

Killua gave him a look that said whatever but understood that he needed to take this more seriously. The doctor took down a few notes and then addressed the both of them again.

"Does it hurt to breathe deeply?"

Killua looked at the doctor and nodded reluctantly.

"Is your voice hoarse or ruff?" Gon nodded to the doctor in confirmation. "Have you coughed up any blood or red spit?"

Gon turned to Killua, a look of fear in his eyes. Killua now looked at his feet that dangled off the side of the table. That was one of the questions he had been hoping to avoid. It had been challenging enough to hide the blood from his friend but lying to him was the worst part. Usually he didn't have a problem with lying, but when it came to Gon it was like he could read Killua's thoughts, and Killua always felt guilty in the end. He had only gotten away with hiding the fact because his friend hadn't directly asked the question.

The former assassin nodded his head slowly, hiding his eyes with his hair.

This was new to Gon. If he had known he'd have dragged his butt down here sooner. Much sooner.

"Okay, Mr. Collins, I would like to do a screening on your lungs to check for any diseases." Killua nodded his head but didn't uncover his eyes.

"Do you know what it is?" Asked Gon. The doctor sighed as if he had been hoping the question wouldn't be asked.

"There are many possibilities, but the one that seems to be most likely is," He sighed and closed his eyes for a moment before continuing.  
"Lung Cancer.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

When the doctor had told them his thoughts neither of them responded. They just sat in silence refusing to look anywhere but their shoes, or the floor, or the ceiling. The doctor left to get the screening ready and still they sat in silence. After a while the doctor returned and told Gon he had to stay in the waiting room while the tests were taken. Killua got his lungs screened and blood taken. It would be a few days before the results came in, so Gon and Killua made their way to their shared apartment in the light rain.

Lung Cancer

The words echoed around his skull ceaselessly. How could he, Killua Zoldyck, have cancer? That just didn't seem possible. He felt numb (When his lungs didn't feel like they were on fire.) Killua had known something was wrong but had been reluctant to acknowledge it. He felt that so long as nothing was said it would be like nothing was wrong. But now,   
with the thoughts hanging heavily in the air, it seemed as if the disease had taken him into its mouth and was slowly gnawing away at his bones.

"Maybe it won't be cancer." Gon stated without his usual grin. It was so odd seeing Gon this way. It made Killua want the cancer to go away all the more.

Killua was almost positive it was cancer because he had never been trained against something like that. How could he? Cancer, in simple terms, was the uncontrollable division of abnormal cells. It would make sense the former assassin would have abnormal cells. After all, his training had been cruel and unusual. He was overwhelmed and dragged down into the dark corners of his mind.

Gon was uncharacteristically silent the rest of the way home. Deep in thought. His best friend couldn't have cancer. He was Killua Zoldyck for crying out loud! No, it was something else. It wasn't the deadly killer cancer.

When they reached their temporary apartment they changed into their dry clothes and sat in the living room/kitchen. The apartment was two beds, and one bath, and a kitchen/ living room area. Gon and Killua had been living there for about three weeks. Gon was laying on the floor, staring at the ceiling, lost in thought. Killua was much the same but sitting in a chair looking at the floor instead.

The fact of the matter is that even if it was cancer or whatever, they didn't have the money to fix it. They had barely scrounged up enough money to pay for the doctor and rent. They needed to take a job but work was hard to come by when your partner gave away their location each time he started hacking. Or when they pass out and you have to carry them back to the city before proceeding with the mission.

"It's okay Killua," Gon said. "We'll find the money to fix you up and then we'll be back to adventuring in no time."

Killua looked up to find Gon staring at him with a goofy grin on his face despite the situation. The smile was contagious and soon Killua had an easy smile resting on his face. His   
best friend always knew how to make him feel better.

But the smile was ripped off his face when a particularly bad fit of coughs exploded from his chest. It hurt his lungs terribly to so much as take a deep breath, but the coughing   
felt like small bombs had imploded in his chest.

Gon was beside Killua in an instant with some of his herb tea that had helped the cough far. Killua recovered enough to take a small sip of the warm drink and swallow it down. It left a soothing river down his throat and warmed him through and through. He gave a small sigh of relief and Gon smiled at the prospect of being able to help.

He offered Killua food but was turned down, which was okay because Gon wasn't really hungry either. For the longest time they sat there in companionable silence, thinking of ways to get some money or find a way to cure Killua.

Gon thought hard. He could go on missions by himself. No. Gon could never leave his friend behind wondering what was going on and if he was okay or not. They could work here in the city, but work was a bit scare at the moment. They needed money. Gon now understood Leorio's reasoning to become a hunter in a new depth.

Leorio.

"Yes!" Gon shouted suddenly, ending the silence. "Leorio can help us if we can't help ourselves! He graduated his doctor school last year, remember?" Killua smiled again at his friend. He was like a lighthouse on a stormy night and Killua was a drowsy ship brought to shore with the help of the bright ray.

"You can be really smart when you want to be." He said and sunk down into the cushiony chair. "But don't call Leorio until we get the results back. Don't want him worrying over nothing." Gon nodded in confirmation and smiled a warm smile at the rare compliment.

Since it was only about 6 o' clock they watched random TV shows (occasionally interrupted by coughing) until it seemed a reasonable hour to head off to bed. Killua left first and entered the white door on the left quietly. Gon could hear the random coughing fit that overtook Killua's lungs.

Gon wanted to go in there and comfort his friend but knew Killua would turn him away with some line like 'stop babying me Gon,' so he stayed put until the coughing had stopped for an hour. That was how he knew that the friend he cared for most in the world had drifted into a restless sleep.

Gon didn't know if he would ever tell Killua how much he meant to him. More than just a best friend. Usually everything Gon thought went straight from his brain to his mouth without filter, but this thought had gotten stuck in his throat each time Killua was around. Each time anyone was around.

Gon turned off the TV, entered the white door on the right, and drifted into a light slumber.

________________________________________

Killua doubted he would get any sleep at all tonight, but he knew Gon wouldn't head off to bed until he thought Killua was sleeping so he suppressed his coughs like his life depended on it. He was tired but the coughing wouldn't cease so he resigned himself with quietly staring at the ceiling.

Killua had had a small hope that Gon might come in to check on him. But even if Gon did Killua would have told him to stop mothering him and go to bed. He just didn't know how to express his feelings towards Gon sometimes. Gon was one of the only people who had meant anything to him in a long time.

There was Alluka of course but his parents had locked her up a while ago. Gon was the only person other than Alluka that he actually cared deeply for. Kurapika and Leorio were his friends but Gon was really the only one who understood him. The only problem was that he had no idea how to tell Gon that he was the most important person in his life right now and that he was so grateful that he had rescued him from his horrendous family.

Killua suppressed a cough and turned on his side. Gon hadn't given up on him, even when the odds were stacked so tall against his favor when Killua went home after the hunter   
test. Then there was the time that…

Killua, despite his previous prediction, drifted off into a fitful sleep. One of the first he had had in days.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

For the second time this week Killua and Gon walked down the sidewalk on a cold and dreary day to the doctor's office. And also for the second time their feelings were the same.

Nervous.

At first neither had really wanted to know what it was that had all but consumed their thoughts. (And Killua's lungs) Sometimes naïveté was simpler. Sometimes. But, as the days dragged on without any word on Killua's condition, curiosity and dread fought viscous battles between the boys' psyche.

Curiosity of what the sickness was.

Dread of finding out.

In those few days Gon and Killua were drained mentally. It was as if all of their thoughts were running a marathon non-stop for days. Sleep was becoming scarce and their bodies were paying for it. Now they had grown weary of naïveté and needed answers to their inquiries before they went insane with unanswered questions.

Before this stupid problem, thought Killua, I could talk easily with Gon. Now every time we have a reasonable conversation, I can't so much as clear my throat without getting a worried look from him. I just want things to go back to the way they used to be. Let's get the stupid results and fix whatever the heck is causing trouble.

Transmuter and enhancer walked through the doors and checked in with Killua's fake name. They sat in front of the fish tank again and lost themselves in their thoughts, which seemed to be the usual now.

I hope to god Killua doesn't have cancer. I'm so worried about him that I can barely think about anything else. But I suppose that would be normal when it comes to cancer. Not that it is cancer….

Gon's thoughts continued along like a runaway train, not stopping or slowing, but becoming more and more frightened the longer they continued on that track.

"Collins."

The nurse had caught both of the Hunters off guard. Which was new to both of them. But neither of them let the slightly depressed tone of her voice slip by. Her eyes also had a bit of pity residing in them. The boy's followed her to their doctor's office instead of the examination room.

When they entered the doctor was reading a file inside of a manila folder. He quickly put the folder aside and gestured to the two chairs in front of his desk. The boys sat and got comfortable in the cushiony chairs.

A strange smell permeated the air. Not going unnoticed by either of the boy's. It must be some sort of medicine the doctor has, they both assumed.

"I have the results from the screening and blood tests. I felt that I should tell you in person instead of over the phone that, Mr. Collins, you have Lung cancer in your right lung."

Silence.

He has cancer.

My Best friend in the entire world has cancer and might…

I have cancer.

I might end up six feet down because of a sickness.

"You are lucky though."

Sapphire blue and caramel brown shot up to meet the doctor's gray-green eyes. Hope sparked into life, small at first, but growing steadily with each passing second.

"We found the disease in its early stages and is much easier to cure than if you had waited, say, another week to see what was wrong. We can do a surgery to remove the cancer at the hospital and do chemotherapy once a month to make sure that it doesn't come back."

The hope that once was a spark was now a fire, burning brightly in the boys' eyes.

Gon shot Killua an 'I told you everything would be fine' look and Killua rolled his eyes. The doctor went on to explain what would happen in the surgery, how long it would take, and who would get paid for doing it.

Gon stopped the doctor and told him that their friend was going to be the one performing the surgery (after being interrupted by a hacking cough) and that they didn't need any   
surgeons other than Leorio. It was strange, but the doctor seemed slightly annoyed by this.

"Fine," he said in a quick tempered tone. "I think that concludes our business. Get out." The doctor's aura had become hostile and unfriendly.

Killua and Gon left with haste. They exited the offices without a nurse escort. Once they found their way out onto the sidewalk they began to discuss the obvious.

"It's cancer." Killua said dumbly.

"It's fixable." Gon stated matter-of-factly. "You'll be absolutely fine. Leorio will do his thing and you'll be back to normal."

"We should get going." Killua said and began to walk up the sidewalk, hands in his pockets.

"I'll call Leorio and see if he can come here or if we should go to him." Gon said and pulled out his beetle phone. He dialed Leorio's number and jogged a bit to catch up with Killua and waited for Leorio to pick up the phone.

While he started up a conversation, catching up with the surgeon, Killua lost himself in his thoughts.

I have cancer. Gon dragged me to the doctors just in time. I will survive this sickness because of Gon. Gon is light, as usual.

"Yeah." Gon said to Leorio after they had caught up. "Well, we've got a problem over here." Gon looked at Killua as he said the dreaded words. "Killua is sick… Yeah it's pretty serious… Lung cancer… Yeah, we're kind of broke… Really! Yeah, that'd be great… Thank you Leorio, and can you get the message to Kurapika… Thanks, Bye!"

Gon looked to Killua with a beaming smile, and Killua's mood lightened ever so slightly.

"Leorio said that he just finished with a surgery and was looking for his next job so we called with perfect timing! He'll be flying here in two days and he'll do the surgery!"

Killua smiled and nodded his head in confirmation. They continued on their way as Gon began to tell Killua about how Leorio was soon to be a one star hunter. Leorio had saved so many lives of young children in poor areas that it seemed only fitting. When the parents would ask what they could do to repay him he would simply reply that, 'life is priceless and no money amount could be put to your child's life.' He had really become quite popular.

It sounds like Leorio finally got what he wanted. Good for him.

When they finally reached the apartment they fell heavily onto the couch in front of the small TV. It felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off their shoulders, replaced by a smaller less concerning one. Usually it was the other way around for cancer patients and their loved ones, but for Gon and Killua that wasn't the case.

Oddly enough it was almost like they were at ease with the information. The stress of not knowing had been enough to completely drain them. But now they knew what was wrong and were able to fix it.

But with what consequences?


	4. Chapter 4

A knock sounded loudly at the door. Gon was making food so Killua pulled himself off the couch and looked out of the eye hole in the door. Leorio stood outside holding a small suit case and glancing at his watch as he tapped his foot impatiently. He wore his usual indigo suit- does he have five pairs of the same suit or something? – And his weird eye glasses were hanging halfway down his nose.

Same old man. Impatient as ever.

Killua was tempted to just stand there and wait until Leorio pounded his fist on the door again- you know, just for fun- But Gon came up and grabbed the door knob before he could stop him.

"Gonnnn…" He whined. In response all he received was a huge grin before Gon invited Leorio in. The first thing that the doctor did was look Killua up and down. Taking in the dark circles under his eyes, pajamas, and unruly hair.

"Looks like you've had a rough week." Leorio stated.

"Make that a rough month," Killua said quietly.

"I'm making sushi," Gon told Leorio.

"You mean that stuff that the Gourmet hunter had us make? Why?" Killua questioned.

"Well I looked up the recipe online and it's actually really easy to make."

"Really I *COUGH, COUGH* didn't... *COUGH* realize… *COUGH, COUGH, COUGH*…" Killua waved his hand to signal that he was done talking and bent double as his lungs heaved. He made his way to the bathroom and spit his coughed up blood in the toilet.

I've never seen cancer before, but I really hope I don't have to see it again. It looks brutal. Leorio thought to himself.

Gon left Leorio standing alone to go and comfort Killua, who had finished hacking up blood and was readying his overused tooth brush for a scrubbing.

Poor Gon, he must be so worried. I will have to make sure that I get this over with swiftly and precisely. With the help of a little nen of course... Is something burning?

"GAH!"

Leorio looked into the kitchen to see a pot full of rice catch on fire. Dark smoke began to fume out of the pot in huge clouds. Leorio ran to the pot and tapped it off the stove trying not to burn himself in the process.

"GON! KILLUA!"

Leorio managed to dump the pot in the sink and turn the water on right before the smoke alarm began wailing. He abandoned the pot for the fire alarm as Gon came rushing in. Behind him Killua made his way a bit slower, tooth brush still in his mouth.

The fire alarm screeched obnoxiously loud, but it only managed to get out seven beeps before Leorio, in a fit of frustration, smashed it into silence. Gon smothered the fire and turned off the water while Killua smiled at the comical situation behind them and removed the tooth cleaner from his mouth

"What did you have in that pot!? Gasoline rice!" Leorio shouted.

"No," Gon rubbed the back of his neck as an embarrassed blush spread across his face and a goofy smile broke out. "I guess I forgot to add the water before I turned the oven on."

"Forgot… the water?" Killua and Leorio said simultaneously.

"How do you forget the water!?" Leorio asked.

"I don't know, you just do?"

Leorio and Killua sighed. Only Gon would manage to forget the water when trying to boil rice. It was no use trying to figure out what went wrong in that brain of his.

Well, I guess we're having take-out tonight. Thought Killua.

After they cleared everything up with the landlady- who had almost evacuated the entire building- Gon grabbed some take-out from the noddle place a block down. Egg rolls and ramen were passed around as everyone found a seat. Killua and Gon took the couch while Leorio took the only chair. He would be staying at the apartment instead of paying for a hotel.

"How long have you had the cancer?"

"A month." Killua said simply. It didn't really bother him to talk about it anymore. He had accepted the facts of cancer.

"Oh, okay… You ready for tomorrow?" Leorio asked. This question Killua did not answer. He mixed his ramen around in its little container. He didn't know how he felt about people slicing him open and removing things from his body, but he supposed it was better than dying.

"Hey Leorio," Gon said, changing the subject to give Killua a break. "Were you able to get in touch with Kurapika?"

"Oh yeah! He said that he was still hunting down the rest of the phantom brigade. He's already taken care of five of them. He said that the one he was chasing now was is an expert at hiding, running, and trapping. Then there was a beeping noise and he told me that a lead just came up and he had to go."

"Oh wow. Five? He has really put a dent in their little group." Killua said.

"I hope that he was able to find more of the Kurta eyes." Gon said. The conversation continued deep into the night, touching topics like Ging, going on missions, and healing. Killua was the first to go. After a brutal attack on his lungs Gon made him some soothing tea, which he downed in one shot, then headed off to his room.

Leorio and Gon talked a bit longer but jet-lag finally kicked in and Leorio found it hard to keep his eyes open. Leorio would be sleeping on the couch, even though Gon had offered him his room. He gathered up the blankets and pillows given to him by Gon and fell asleep swiftly.

Gon fell onto his bed and sighed at the soft coziness of the blankets.

Everything is going to be fine tomorrow. Leorio will heal Killua and then we can go on missions again. Just like before.  
Gon drifted into unconsciousness.  
______________

Leorio had left earlier that morning to get everything ready at the hospital. Gon packed a small bag since he would be at the hospital all day and yelled to Killua to get up. He finished packing and called again to Killua. No response sounded behind the closed door except coughing.  
Gon threw his bag over his shoulder and pounded on Killua's door.

"Hey we have to go! We're gonna be late!" moaning sounded on the other side of the door. Gon took that as a 'come in' and opened the door.

Killua was hanging halfway off the side of his low mattress, face on the floor in front of a small pool of blood. Blood ran out of Killua's nose and in a thin trickle out of his mouth.

"Hurts." Killua said weakly, then coughed up more blood. Gon was by his side immediately. He pat his back as coughed up more blood than he should lose. He stopped and started to fall. Gon grabbed his friend before he fell in the puddle and gently put him back on the mattress.

"Hey Killua! Killua!"

"Help, me…" Killua's blue eyes cracked open weakly.  
"Gon… I'm so… scared."

Killua just admitted he was scared. He needs a doctor now.

"Gon, don't leave." Killua weakly grabbed Gon's hand but he didn't have the strength to keep it there and it began to fall away. Gon grabbed it and held tight.

"Killua I will always be by your side. Always." A weak smile cracked across his chapped lips and Killua fell into unconsciousness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You're welcome. MHAHAHA~


	5. Chapter 5

"Killua!" Gon shouted as he shook his best friend's shoulders. It was no use. He was out cold.

Dammit Killua!

Gon hosted the assassin boy's limp body up piggy-back style and ran out of the apartment. The hospital was only a few blocks away. Gon could barely hear Killua's shallow breathing in his ear, even though his head was resting on his shoulder.

Killua…

Thoughts raced through Gon's head as everything they had been through together seeped into his mind. All of the battles, all of the missions. Everything. He barely remembered the times before he had befriended Killua. All of it seemed meaningless now.

One more block to go. People scattered quickly when they saw Gon coming, but he hardly noticed them. His mind was focused only on saving the silver haired, blue eyed assassin boy with cancer.

The hospital loomed into view as Gon rounded the last corner. A red cross rested on the front of the white building. Glass double doors swung open wide as a former patient exited the large building and Gon sprinted in before the doors closed again.

"I need to get Killua to Leorio! He should be here to perform a surgery!" Gon shouted at the receptionist in a rushed and hurried voice.

She took one look at the boy on his back and knew that he was the lucky patient that all of the doctors had been talking about this morning. The one who would be saved by the famous surgeon for free. She had nosily looked up what room he was in earlier and told Gon.

He sprinted away without thanking her- which was odd for Gon- and navigated his way through the maze of hallways.

402… 402… 402… 402!

Gon busted into the surgery room to find Leorio washing his hands. He was dressed in dusty blue doctor clothes with a face mask around his neck. A hair net thing rested on the counter next to him. The room was a sterilized white and brightly lit with various light fixtures. Two huge lights hung over a cushioned table surrounded by delicate looking machines.

Gon gently placed Killua on the table and turned to Leorio, who still looked a bit lost.

"He got worse. You have to hurry."

A look of determination filled his face. He nodded in confirmation and suited up. He pulled the hair thing over his hair, the mask on his face, and some rubber gloves over his hands. He turned on the lights over the table and pulled out a roll of sharp tools that looked like they had come from a horror movie. Leorio hooked Killua up to the machines and turned to Gon.

"Leave. Go wait in the waiting room."

"But-"

"Go! You can't help him in here. You'll only get in my way."

Gon looked at Killua. He took in the dried blood and limp silver hair. He knew that right now, only Leorio could help him. Gon turned and left the room.  
Leorio spun around to Killua and got to work.  
________________________________________

"Sir, could you please sit down?" The waiting room receptionist asked politely. Gon was beginning to make even her nervous as he paced back and forth with a horribly worried and upset look on his face.

"Sorry," he muttered and sat in one of the numerous waiting room seats. He was absentmindedly biting his nails as he stared at the floor. His eyes were swimming with worry.  
Everything is going to be fine. Leorio has got everything under control.

Everything is wrong Killua shouldn't have passed out like that. Something is amiss.

The doctor had said that it was in its early stages. It could be cured.

The doctor is obviously wrong because that is not like the early stages of cancer.

A battle raged inside of Gon as the demon and angel on each of his shoulders argued back and forth.

He's going to die.

He is perfectly fine.

No more adventures. Ever.

We'll be going on missions as soon as he heals up.

I'll never see his smiling face again.  
…  
No response from the angel.

That thought had Gon in turmoil. Never see his friend smile again. He might never be able to break through Killua's mask of feelings to see him smile at one of his friend's lame jokes. He might never be able to see Killua smile happily as he defeats Gon in Halo. Never see Killua's soft smile as Gon tries to cheer him up when he remembers how unhappy he was with his family.

Never see Killua…

As Gon's thoughts drifted Leorio worked diligently. Leorio was doing a job that usual required three people working together all at once, by himself. But that was what his Nen was for right? He worked away, clearing the cancer from Killua's lungs. It had gone from being just in his right lung, to spreading into his left lung and reaching towards his heart.  
The disease had progressed so much faster than normal. Every time Leorio cleared away some of the cancer he would gently send his Nen to the inflicted area. Stopping the cancer from returning. He continued until every cell of cancer was gone.

-  
Three Hours later  
-

"Gon,"

Leorio came into the waiting room and beckoned to Gon. He followed him out into the hallway and through the maze that Leorio navigated with ease. They arrived at a glass window. Inside was a room holding four beds. Only one was occupied.

"The cancer had spread much more rapidly than expected. I'm amazed that he wasn't in worse shape last night."

"He's strong." Gon said as he stared at Killua's motionless form.

"He has to stay in here for two days before anyone can visit him. He is very vulnerable to sickness right now and it's just a precaution."

"Did he wake up at all?" Leorio thought for a bit then simply said no.

Gon didn't want to leave but he wasn't allowed to stay. Leorio managed to drag him home by insisting that he could return tomorrow and that he needed sleep, or else he wouldn't be able to form coherent sentences when Killua woke up.

Gon left reluctantly after telling the unconscious Killua that he would be back as soon as he could.

-  
After Gon left  
-

Killua's doctor, Harold Smith, enters the hospital where he meets with the usual nurse. He gives her the 'nutrition' bags and she gives him his share of the money. But before he leaves he has a request.

"A boy with cancer just came here earlier. He has silver hair. Make sure he gets one of those."

"Yes, sir." With that they part ways and go about their own business.


	6. Chapter 6

The light streamed in softly through the single window of the hospital room. A boy with raven hair sat in a chair next to a hospital bed. He held the silver haired boy's limp hand.

Killua had yet to wake up in the two days of recovery time. They had moved him to a normal hospital room so that Gon could visit. (Stay until they kicked him out) Gon talked to Killua for hours on end, telling him about the weather, what he saw on the way here, how much he missed Killua. Whatever came to mind he said it.

It was now the fourth day Killua had been in a comatose state. Gon told him the time every once in a while and he always made sure to tell him what day it was. Gon told himself that he had to be strong for Killua just until Killua could be strong for himself. So he tried to just be happy that his friend was alive.

Why can't I move? I can hear Gon's voice. I can feel the sun on my face. I can feel Gon's fingers tracing random shapes in my palm. So why can't I get up. Why can't I open my eyes?   
Move my lips. Twitch my fingers. Nothing. But Gon is here. What is going on?

Killua's consciousness had awakened, but his body was completely paralyzed. Something was wrong, the signals that his brain sent to his limbs were being blocked. He gave up trying to move and just listened to Gon talk.

His friend told him everything he needed to know. He was in a coma-like state. Leorio had had to go help someone else in need and left after Killua had finished his recovery time. Gon was all alone at the apartment now and he missed Killua terribly. Killua wanted to tell Gon how much he meant to him. Right then and there. But nothing moved. Not even his heart rate increased as the steady beep… beep… of the monitor beside his bed told him.

It was late now. A few hours past visiting time. Gon had managed to jerk a few heart strings and the nurses had allowed him to stay late. But one nurse would have none of it and when Gon's extra hours were up he was practically shoved out of the door by her.

Killua could hear and picture the commotion, but he could do nothing about it. Gon's hand was pulled away and Killua wished desperately that it would return. But it did not. The cruel nurse came back into the room (Killua knew it was her because a peculiar medicinal scent followed her like a ghost) and switched out his nutrition bag for another. It had the same smell as her. Come to think of it, so did the bag that he had had earlier. But the smell of this one was stronger.

When she switched the drips his consciousness began to slip as if she had dunked his head underwater. Without Gon beside him to pull him back he drowned. As his mind faded he tried to hold on to something, anything. The beeping of the monitor was all his senses could grasp.

Beep… Beep… Beep… Beep… Beep… Beep… Beep… Beep… Beep… Beep… Beep… Beep… Beep…  
________________________________________

When Gon returned the next day everything cleared. Killua was able to think. When Gon wasn't there the only thing he was able to do was hear the monitor. After Gon had been there for a few hours the cruel nurse asked if she could talk to him in the hallway.

"Of course." He said cheerfully.

Killua strained to hear what they said and he managed to catch most of the conversation.

"Sir, if your friend is still out for the count in two days you'll have to start paying a fee off 400 dollars a week."

"For the room?"

"Yes, and the care that we have to give to keep your friend alive."

"Alright, whatever it takes."

Killua could practically feel the maniacal smile that nurse made. It sent shivers down his spine. Gon returned, shut the curtain in front of the door window to stop prying eyes -the nurse- and grabbed Killua's hand again. Killua wished that he would have done this before this mess. Gon's hand fit his like Yin to Yang. If he could have sighed in content he would have. He didn't though.

Gon was quiet for a bit. Then the tears came. Silently at first, landing lightly on Killua's hand. Then he sobbed audibly. Killua wished he wouldn't do that. It hurt him more to hear and feel his best friend crying then to bathe in acid. Especially when it was because of him. He wanted to tell him to stop, to cry with him, to hug him until he felt better. Anything. But he couldn't fucking move.

"Killua… I know your recovering and everything but… I need you to wake up… I can't… There's no… no more money. Killua I need you to wake up. I need you to talk to me. Say my name. Smile. Be there."

Killua's heart ripped apart slowly.

I'm right here Gon.

"Please Killua." He sobbed.

I'm here.

"I need you," He whispered.

I need you too, Gon, please see me.

Gon rested his forehead on Killua's hand and let the tears fall. Gon felt alone. Leorio was gone. None of his other friends were here, and his best friend in the entire world wasn't waking up after a surgery. It felt like he had been abandoned by everyone. Why did everyone leave him? Even his own father couldn't put up with him.

He cried harder and just let all of the worries, and sadness leak out in his tears for a long time. After a bit he looked to Killua's face and saw tears falling from his closed eyes onto his pillow. The tears left damp trails down his cheeks. Killua didn't move but the tears kept falling.

Finally I can do something. Even if it is cry… Even if Gon is watching… Even if my heart is breaking and unrepairable.

"Killua…" Gon threw his arms around Killua's neck and nuzzled his face into his sleeping friend shoulder.

Maybe it isn't completely unrepairable.

"I knew you were there! I knew that you could hear me!" Gon continued to cry into Killua's shoulder. Killua wished desperately that he could hug Gon back but was still content even when he couldn't. Not with that nutrition bag running into his blood stream. There was nothing else that could be stopping him from moving.

That damn nurse. She's going to get what's coming to her.


	7. Chapter 7

Gon hugged Killua like the world was ending for a while, but he eventually relinquished his grip on him. He resigned himself to contently holding the former assassin's hand tightly and tracing random patterns about it. The nurse came and ripped Gon away, thoroughly pissing Killua off.

She was poisoning him. She was forcibly removing Gon. She was being a bitch. He could imagine himself just punching her right in the face, watching as the light in her eyes faded and she passed out. That was when Killua's fingers twitched. A small movement but still a huge achievement. Killua realized then that he had been trained against this poison, whatever it was. His body just needed to heal up before he could effectively beat the crap out of a certain nurse.

With the poison continuously pumping into his body it would be harder heal up though. He would need a way to get rid of. Being unable to move posed as a challenge. He would have to come up with something before the end of tomorrow.

The nurse returned and replaced his bag of poison. This time though the world didn't fade as quickly and he was able to grasp a scent. The scent of toxins.  
________________________________________

Gon returned home to the apartment. He had no idea how he was going to pay rent if Killua didn't wake up tomorrow, but that was okay. He would sleep on the streets if he had to. No matter what, he would save his best friend.

Killua is awake. Sort of.

Gon grabbed the handle to the fridge and tugged it open. Mustard, pickles, lettuce, and half a tomato.

Oh yeah, I ate everything else yesterday. Well…

He looked to the counter and saw an un-opened loaf of bread.

I guess I'll just have a sandwich without the meat.

Gon quickly made a sandwich of lettuce, pickles, mustered, and a tomato slice. He took a generous bite and thought to himself,

I've had worse.

He finished his meal quickly and followed it with a glass of water. It was late now, almost midnight, so he entered the white door on the right and laid down to get some sleep. He let his worries and concerns about Killua fall as his conciseness slipped into oblivion.

The next day Gon awoke before the sun. He yawned and got ready for the morning. Ten minutes before visiting hours began he left the apartment and made his way down to the hospital. The sun was now just beginning to rise over the horizon and few people had made their way out to the sidewalks yet.

The morning was pleasantly warm with a slight breeze running through the buildings. The early sunlight was gently shining upon the ground and the trees lining the sidewalk scattered the light, making pretty little patterns and shapes on the sidewalk.

Gon breathed in the fresh air of the morning. It smelled of cherry blossoms. Then the sharp scent of the hospital interrupted the gentle beauty of the morning. Gon hated the smell of the hospital but, he was going to go in whether he liked the smell or not.

When he entered he waved to the nurse at the front desk and made his way up to the fourth floor. The elevator ride seemed to be excruciatingly slow and he regretted not taking the stairs.

Oh well.

The elevator dinged and the doors slid open. At the same time the door to the stairs opened and a blond male wearing blue tribal clothes emerged from the stair well.

"Kurapika!" Gon exclaimed. He ran over to his friend and began talking rapidly to the dazed chain user. He told him about everything, filling him in about Killua being able to hear him (politely leaving out the part where Killua cried because Gon knew how he liked to seem like he was tough and didn't care about anything sometimes)

By the time Gon finished he was out of breath and on the verge of tears.

"Killua still hasn't woken up, Kurapika. What if he never wakes up?" Gon murmured, surprising even himself with these words. Usually he was so optimistic.

"Gon, do you know if he might be awake now?"

Gon lifted himself out of his dark thoughts and smiled. He led the way down the hall at a quick pace. When they reached Killua's room Gon paused for just a second, hand on the door handle, then he opened the door to see his best friend the same as he left him.

Killua's head laid on a white pillow, silver hair tousled about, and thin hospital sheet was thrown over his resting body. His breathing was slow and steady not faltering or jumping in any way. Gon's spirits fell but didn't break. You could never break Gon's spirit.

"Morning Killua." Gon said cheerily. "Kurapika came to visit you today." They both entered the room and sat in the chairs around the hospital bed.

Oh, Kurapika is here? I thought that he had a lead on one of the phantom brigade members though.

"Oy, Kurapika, I thought you were busy with the phantom brigade." Gon said, almost as though he and Killua had synced thoughts.

"Yeah, I got a lead and it led me here. I thought that I should visit for a while since I don't know the next time I'll be able to. Gon-"

"GRRRR…" Gon's stomach rumbled loudly, cutting off Kurapika.

"Umm, are you hungry?"

"Haha, yeah, just a lot." Gon laughed as he rubbed the back of his neck in an embarrassed movement. Kurapika laughed lightly at him.

"I didn't have breakfast either. Do you want to go grab something to eat?"

"No, I can't leave Killua. He might get lonely."

It's okay Gon, you obviously need to eat something. Don't go starving yourself for me stupid.

A sad smile spread across Kurapika's face and his bluish-silver eyes shone. He was most definitely Killua's best friend.

"How about this? I'll go grab some to go breakfast for us both and then we can eat it here, that sound good?" Gon nodded his head vigorously.  
Of course Kurapika would think of a solution that Gon would agree on too.

"Alright any requests?" He asked, standing.

"Hamburgers." Gon said instantaneously. He even said it with a straight face. Kurapika raised an eyebrow but shrugged his shoulder and turned and left.

Gon turned his attention back to Killua. He picked up his hand and held it as usual. He began to describe the morning to his best friend.

Gon stopped his description abruptly though as he felt an uneasy and slightly hostile aura approach the hospital room. The door to the room creaked open slowly and before it could open all the way Gon used Zetsu and darted behind the door to catch the intruder by surprise.

Killua's former doctor, Mr. Smith entered the room.


	8. Chapter 8

Gon was confused. Why was he here? Was he just visiting Killua? Was he still mad at them? Gon didn't move from his spot, as the doctor was still unaware that he was even in the room. Gon decided to wait and see what he would do.

The doctor quietly approached Killua's resting form. He was dressed in a long white button down shirt and black pants. In his right hand a large leather bag resided. His free hand clenched and unclenched slowly.

The doctor reached the side of the bed and began to rummage through his bag. A stethoscope appeared in his hand and he placed the bag on the floor. He unwound the cord and placed it in his ears.

Is he just going to check his heartbeat? What is going on?

Gon was thoroughly confused. He had no idea what was going on. He was trying to decide whether he should call out to the doctor and question him or wait a bit longer. The doctor placed the large end over Killua's heart and listened.

What the Hell! Gon's presence disappeared so he's using Zetsu, but why? Why is he letting this thing touch me?

Gon was just about to interrupt the doctor from doing whatever he was doing when the doctor began to mutter under his breath.

"Damn, how the hell is he awake? I'll have to increase the dosage before his body wakes up." The doctor turned to put his stethoscope away.

The doctor and the nurse are working together! That's why the doctor was hostile when he wouldn't get paid!

"What! What did you just say?!" Gon was instantly in front of Killua's sleeping form to protect him from an 'increased dosage.' The doctor stumbled backwards at the sudden appearance of the boy with raven hair. He collided with the nutrition bag stand and knocked it over. The IV in Killua's arm was ripped from the vein as it clattered to the ground, the bag full of liquid exploding all over the floor.

Yes! I'll be able to wake up now. I need a little bit of time though, stall him Gon!

Killua's fingers twitched.

"When did… How?" The doctor stuttered. Gon's eyes held a frightening look. One that said, 'Answer truthfully or there will be consequences.' The doctor held his hands to his sides and backed away gradually. Gon advanced every step that he retreated.

"All I said was-" From his sides his hands shot up and threw silver, razor edged knives with blades the size of pencils. Gon ducked as the first one sailed over his head. He was about to dodge the second one that was headed at a downward arc toward his shoulder but he stopped at the last second and used his Nen as quickly as he could to soften the blow. The knife grazed his skin, leaving a small cut. If he had dodged that attack the knife would have pierced the defenseless Killua.

Killua's toes curled.

The doctor saw and understood Gon's weakness, now he threw the knives at Killua in a sick game of reverse dodge ball as he made his way towards the door. He threw high and low, left and right, opposite sides. Anything that made Gon stretch out and have to have intense concentration. The knives just kept coming. The doctor seemed to have an endless supply of them.

Gon began to find it increasingly challenging to transfer his Nen to each side of his body rapidly just to move it back again. His movements began to get sloppy as his   
concentration slipped. The knives began to slash him more frequently and they cut deeper. Then the knives suddenly stopped and the doctor was gone.  
Killua made fists with his hands.

The poison doctor had escaped. Gon sank to his knees. True to the name Killua had given him he had poisoned the knives he had thrown. It must have been some kind of blood thinning medicine because Gon's wounds continued to gush even after he had been sitting there for ten minutes.

Killua moved his leg off the side of the bed lethargically. He had yet to open his eyes.

Gon… why aren't you moving?

Killua could feel his presence a few feet in front of the bed but he hadn't moved in a while. Killua willed his limbs to move and got a response from two of the four. Now both of his legs hung over the side of the bed. He opened his sapphire eyes and found himself looking at a ceiling. He willed his limbs to move again and this time they listened.  
Killua sat up very slowly on the edge of the bed. The first and only thing that he saw was Gon's unconscious form on the floor in the middle of a continuously enlarging pool of dark red blood and a circle of knives. Killua had intended for his body to stand up and go to Gon but that's not how his body functioned. He scooted off the bed and ended up falling to the floor.

His cloth hospital gown absorbed the mixture of liquids on the floor. First it only took up the poison that had, until recently, resided in Killua's veins, but as Killua scooted closer to the person he cared for most in this world, the cloth began to absorb red.

"…Gon…" Killua croaked out. His voice was hoarse and ruff from not using it. He clutched Gon's hand like a life line. The red kept gushing from him. Crimson life leaked from his body. Killua didn't know what to do, he couldn't help him. He tried to stand but there was no way that was happening. He would need at least another fifteen minutes to stand and another twenty five minutes before he could even walk.

Gon is going to bleed out because I can't help him…

Killua's thoughts turned grim. He tried to cover some of the deeper wounds with the sheets and pillows but the poison was to strong.

"Gon… I didn't… die on you… you… can't… die on me. You said… that you would be… by… my side always… you can't… leave me now." Killua spoke. His tears mixed with Gon's blood. Right when Killua thought that all was lost Kurapika walked in with two brown paper bags. The bags hit the floor as he took in the sight. The previously comatose boy was now awake and alive, while his innocent, energetic friend was lying in a pool of his own blood, on the brink of death, surrounded by knives.

"He won't stop… bleeding." Killua struggled out. Kurapika ran back into the hallway to retrieve the nurse he had passed on the way here. Before he had reached her he shouted that his friend was bleeding out and that the blood would not clot. She ran quickly to get a certified doctor.

"You're going to be… okay." Killua's voice was now beginning to clear up. He hugged Gon to him tightly and sobbed, murmuring to him that 'everything would be okay now,' to his motionless, unconscious form.


	9. Chapter 9

Gon now rested in the hospital. The doctor had patched him up and given him more blood. Now he was sleeping soundly. The doctor said that everything would be fine and that he would wake up soon. As soon as Killua had known that Gon would be okay he set off to find a certain nurse.

The bag Gon had brought with him had a pair of Killua's clothes. Presumably so that if he woke up he would have clothes other that the hospital gown. He had told Kurapika and the sleeping Gon that he would be back shortly and set off. Few words had been said between Killua and Kurapika, he had only informed him of what had happened to Gon.  
Now cloaked in Zetsu he made his way covertly down the maze of halls to the break room. There was a single doctor but no sign of the nurse he sought out. He made his way to the receptionist area and was about to turn a corner when a familiar scent drifted to his senses. Though his nose wasn't as strong as Gon's it was still more powerful than an average persons. But that didn't really matter because the smell was so incredibly potent. He turned back and followed the scent to another hospital room.

He peered through the door and saw a little girl resting on a white hospital bed. The nurse was just finishing changing out the poison bag. She had brown hair and dark brown eyes. No one was in the room with the 'sleeping' girl other than the nurse. Killua supposed that the girl still had her senses and would be able to hear him if burst in so he decided to wait.

How many more people has she poisoned?

She finished and left the room. She was carrying three more bags with her. Killua tailed her for a bit and waited for a quiet spot to interrupt her. His chance came when a supply closet in an empty corridor was left slightly ajar.

He waited until she was right beside the door then shoved her into the room. He locked the door behind him and smiled in satisfaction when he saw that two of the three bags had burst when the nurse had fallen to the ground.

"What the Hell! Who do-" Her words froze in her mouth, unspoken, when she saw the boy in the doorway. He was the former comatose boy. Former cancer patient. He was the boy who she had been poisoning for the past few days. He was the boy with hazy blue eyes, devoid of feeling. He was the boy that was slowly advancing on her with a menacing aura that was coming out in vicious waves.  
________________________________________

He made his way down the hall slowly. A piece of crumpled paper had a list of names and rooms sloppily scrawled down the side. He had made his way to fifteen of the twenty three rooms so far. Only eight more to go.

He looked down at the small smear of blood on the paper. The nurse had gotten what she had deserved. Sadly Killua had not killed her. He didn't know how Gon would react to that. He probably wouldn't have been too upset, she had been poisoning not only Killua, but twenty three other people. No he hadn't killed her, but she wouldn't be causing any more trouble. That was for sure.

She hadn't had any information about the doctor's current whereabouts. All she knew was that she switched the normal bags for poison ones when the patient was at risk for comatose. The family would pay the extra fee for a while and then she would switch them back till they woke up. She got a third of the money for her trouble. She would be leaving within the hour with the police as soon as they got here do to an anonymous tip.

He approached the next room and saw that it was the little girl he had seen earlier. When he went in he checked the chart beside her bed. He flipped it to the beginning and searched for the date. It looked like she had been like this for three months. He put the chart back on to the table and manipulated his hand into claws. He slashed open the bag and watched as it drained to the floor.

You've been fighting for a while but you can stop now.

Seven more to go.  
________________________________________

Killua returned to Gon's room, ignored Kurapika, sat next to Gon's bed, and grabbed his hand. Gon had appeared to be sleeping with his eyes closed and his breathing even, but in reality he had been awake for the past five minutes and had found it challenging to open his eyes. So he had just kept them closed while strength and blood began to build up within him, when Killua had come in. Killua was quite surprised when Gon opened his innocent eyes and looked at him for a second before pulling his hand out of Killua's to throw a huge hug around his shoulders.

"Killua! You're awake!" he cried happily. Killua was stunned for a second before he returned the hug and told his best friend,  
"You were the one who was asleep just a few second ago, ding bat."

"But you were asleep longer!" Gon said as he pulled back to look into Killua's eyes. "I was afraid you wouldn't wake up."

"Gon…"

"But you did!" He said, his tanned face brightening. Killua noticed a single red cut running horizontal across Gon's face.

"Gon, I am so sorry." He said as he held Gon's cheek and ran his pale thumb across the wound.

"It wasn't your fault Killua." Gon said as he subconsciously leaned into Killua's hand. Killua didn't move his hand away. A small smile played at Killua's lips and Gon's heart fluttered, the devil that had been on his shoulder was wrong. He could see his best friend's lovely deep blue eyes light up with that smile.

"I could hear everything you told me after the fourth day, Gon."

"I knew when I saw you cry with me." Gon's eyes darted to where Kurapika's chair was and saw that it was now vacant. "I missed your smile." Killua's face turned a deep crimson and for a second neither of them moved, they were absolutely still as they stared into each other's eyes.

"And I missed yours." Gon searched Killua's eyes for a second then shut his eyes and closed the short space between them, kissing him lightly on the lips. The silver haired boy hesitated for a second, eyes wide, and then he kissed him back.


	10. Chapter 10

Kurapika joined the two about fifteen minutes after their kiss with two paper bags containing burgers, and three milkshakes. One chocolate and the other two vanilla. When he had walked in they were simply holding hands and talking quietly to each other. The only difference was that Killua was sitting next to Gon on the bed, squished up against his side in the small shared space.

Killua blushed when Kurapika pointedly stared at their entwined hands and his sapphire gaze wouldn't hold his silver stare. Gon didn't seem to mind at all and he just contentedly greeted the Kurta, all the while holding his best friend/boyfriend's hand. Kurapika blinked.

It's about time they got together. Everyone else could see it, and now they finally do too.

Kurapika gave Gon a paper bag and a vanilla milkshake. Killua received the chocolate milkshake.

"Hey! How come Gon gets a burger and I don't?" He called as Kurapika took a seat across from the bed. Gon opened the bag and pulled out the contents, two large hamburgers. 

"Two!" Killua exclaimed.

"Because Gon lost a lot of blood and has to regain his strength by eating. He needs it. You, on the other hand, just woke up from a coma a few hours ago after being tube fed for a week. If you gorge yourself on solid foods you'll puke." Kurapika stated as he pulled out his own food and began eating.

"Oh, okay. I guess that makes sense." The ex-assassin said. He took a sip of his milkshake.

Mmm, Chocolate.

He was content with his chocolate milkshake. He looked over to Gon and saw that he had already inhaled his first sandwich and was halfway through the second. His eyes widened a bit but he said nothing as he had attacked his now empty milkshake the same way. But it was chocolate so of course it wouldn't have lasted long in Killua Zoldyck's possession.

"So why was that doctor attacking you in the first place?" Kurapika asked, getting straight to the point. Killua tossed his empty cup into the trash can across the room.

"He was going to do something to Killua so that he wouldn't wake up so I tried to stop him."

"You did stop him." Killua stated. "That doctor had been drugging me. The nurse that would drag you away would switch out the bags she got from the doctor." Killua said matter-of-factly.

"He had been poisoning you the whole time!"

"Yeah, I think it was some sort of paralyzing toxin that-"

"Wait," Kurapika cut in, "what did you say this doctor's name was?" Killua looked to Gon who had found the doctor in the first place.

"Harold… something." Gon said, drawing a blank.

"Harold Smith?"

"Yeah that's it! Harold Smith." Gon shouted.

"Gon, did I tell you about why I was here?"

"You had a lead that led you here."

"Yes, and that lead was that the Phantom brigade member I'm after was selling some drugs on the side to earn some extra cash. The name of the person the member was selling   
to is Harold Smith."

"So the Phantom Brigade had a hand in this. Sort of." Killua said quietly. Gon had a tendril of smoke exiting either side of his head as his brain took the twists and turns of the conversation one by one.

"Kurapika, we're going to help you find the doctor. Then we're going to return the favor." Killua gestured to the hospital room. Kurapika nodded his head, a determined look hardening his features.  
________________________________________

Gon was discharged from the hospital and sent home with a warning to stay hydrated and take it easy. Back at the apartment Killua set up the spare bed (Couch) while Gon got some more rest. He took a few extra quilts and a pillow and threw them on to the couch in disarray for Kurapika to figure out.

When the guest had settled in the boy with silver hair went to his room, the white door on the left. He hadn't seen it in a week but, from what he could remember, it was exactly the same. The only difference was that his pile of clothes in the corner was short one set. Two if you count the pajamas that he had been delivered to the hospital in. Leorio had just cut the bloodied shirt off of his weak body to perform the surgery, and he had gotten blood all over his pants so he just left them at the hospital.

He sighed and collapsed on the low mattress.

Home sweet home, for now.

He looked to the side and saw a faint outline of a darker spot on the already dark carpet. His sharp eyes made out the blood stain even though it was pitch black in the room. His   
night vision and day vision were very much the same.

He could faintly remember the day that he had woken up feeling like death was yanking him into the folds of its black cloak with a sharp, skeletal hand. He could hardly think past the overwhelming pain each breath had caused him. It was worse than any of the training he had undergone with his family. Which says a lot about the amount of agony he was in.  
Before he knew what was happening he was coughing/throwing up blood over the side of the bed. He could faintly hear Gon call his name then come into his room, barely feel his hand on his back as his body released so much blood. His head spun and he began to fall, gravity being stronger than his will at the moment. Gon took his shoulders and put him on the bed. When he saw Gon his head cleared for a moment. Gon shouted something to him. He couldn't quite make out the sound, but he read his lips and understood that he was shouting his name.

He shut his eyes for a moment and felt the vibrations of Gon's yelling in his ears. He cracked his eyes back open and looked Gon square in his amber eyes. He broke through the haze of pain for a second and tried to tell his friend that something was wrong.

"Help, me…" Gon's eyes had noticeably widened at this.

"Gon… I'm so… scared." He had said as an afterthought. What was going on? Was death about to rip him away from his existence on this cruel planet? Was it wrong that for a second this was okay with Killua? He would never have to feel pain again. It wasn't the physical pain, but the emotional pain that hurt the worst. It would be gone. No more wondering why he had been born into such a sick and evil family. No more being hated by the all of the families of the people he had killed. No more guilty feelings about killing them.

It was the worst when he remembered the man he killed and then had to understand that his little baby daughter would grow up without a father. Before he had met Gon that pain had never been very present. Every once and a while he would wonder, but now it actually hurt. No more of that pain or any pain, ever. But the second was over when he realized that if death did take him then he would never see Gon again. Never see his embarrassed smile when he did something stupid. Never hear his simple naïve answers to complicated questions. He would never get to see any of the people he cared about most, Gon was at the top of that list.

That was why he was scared. The unknown was so very frightening that he actually told Gon the truth. Granted, he was a bit drunk with the pain of cancer eating away at his insides but he still said it.

Even though those were the things that flashed through his mind then, it was the most frightening for Killua when Gon attempted to stand and leave. Was Gon going to leave him here? To die? It was his worst nightmare come true it had seemed, that Gon would leave him. A though jumped into his mind.

If I died would he even care?

Killua knew now that of course he would care. He had known then too, but he was a bit out of it at that point. He had reached up for his hand with his last reserves of strength to keep him here.

"Gon, don't leave." The reserves ran dry and his hand was taken by gravity. Before his wandering mind could comprehend what happened Gon had grabbed Killua's hand back and held it between his own.

Few sounds had gotten through to Killua before and few sounds reached him now. He had to rely on his blackening sight to read the words that came on Gon's lips.

"Killua I will always be by your side. Always." Joy spread through his body as his organs began to shut down and a small smile splayed itself on his lips before he had passed out.

Thank you Gon. For shining your light on my darkness.

He let his mind slip and fell asleep.


	11. Chapter 11

The trio of hunters made their way down the sidewalk to the doctor's office. With no other leads, it seemed as good a place as any to start.

Because they didn't know whether or not any of the other people working there were in league with the doctor, they had to sneak in covertly. Cloaked in Zetsu they ran past the receptionist at the front desk one by one. She didn't look up once. They entered the back rooms with their white washed walls and patterned tile floor. The maze of hallways   
proved challenging to navigate at first, until Gon caught a whiff of the poison the doctor must have had stashed somewhere in his office.

They followed the raven haired boy until they reached a solid wooden door with a plaque that read, Harold Smith in large black bolded letters. Kurapika checked the copper door knob. Locked. The blond looked down both sides of the hallway and, seeing that it was empty, drew two pieces of thin malleable metal. He inserted them into the key hole and maneuvered them until a solid click sounded in the locking mechanism.

He tried the knob again, and this time it turned smoothly. He looked down the vacant hall once more, then entered with the other two behind him. The room looked as if someone had been hurriedly collecting papers, knocking over random things in the process. Folders and patient papers littered the white tile floor of the office. All of the filing cabinets were left hanging open, the desk was slightly askew, and the painting on the wall was hanging by a single nail in the corner, leaving the picture dangling sideways.

A key pad was peeking out behind it. Killua walked over to investigate. Kurapika began skimming over papers looking for anything of importance. Gon tried to pinpoint exactly where the bags had been hidden.

How cliché. A safe behind a painting.

Killua thought that no one in their right mind would try to hide something of importance behind a painting. I mean, of all places you could look that is almost always the place to start. Killua ran his hands along the part of the wall he assumed the safe would be. He knocked against the wall and heard a solid thump.

Well, that's unusual. Is it not a hollow safe?

Killua pulled the front of the key pad off of the wall to get to the wires. He quickly hacked into it like his brother Milluki taught him and unlocked whatever it was that the key pad was connected to. Two beeps sounded directly under where Gon had been investigating and a blue floor tile popped open. Gon jumped back, startled, then looked to Killua with a question in his eyes.

Kurapika looked up from one of his papers and approached the tile. All three of them surrounded it and crouched down for a better look. Kurapika slid his fingers under the lip and pulled it off quickly. Gon covered his nose immediately and Killua and Kurapika both sniffed in disdain. A strong unpleasant odor radiated out of the small foot by foot hole in the ground.

It was too dark to make out what exactly was in the bottom of the hole- almost defiantly drugs of some kind- so Killua grabbed the desk lamp, turned it on, and yanked it over until it shone in the hole. Wilted leaves littered to bottom of the square hole, nothing more, nothing less. It was what they had been expecting really. This was where he would hide the drugs. It probably developed them elsewhere seeing as there was no place that he could do what he needed to here.

It was a dead end.

They searched the rest of his office for another hour and came up with nothing. All of the important documents (if there ever were any) were gone. There were no leads at all on this guy.

"We'll have to figure something else out," Kurapika said.

"Yeah," They agreed.

The trio once again made their way back through the halls, hidden with Zetsu. They walked the maze for a long time before they finally admitted defeat. They were lost. Gon had tried to catch a whiff of outside, but his senses were a bit burned out from the overwhelming smell of drugs he had encountered earlier. They resigned to find a nurse.  
When they finally encountered one they quickly asked for directions. She told them that she would lead them instead since she wasn't doing anything at the moment. The nurse continued for a bit but kept stealing glances back at Killua. He promptly ignored her, but the longer this continued the more uncomfortable he became. He was used to being unseen in the shadows, not being gawked at while on a mission.

"Is something wrong?" He asked when she looked over her shoulder once again. She had thought that she had been pretty stealthy thus far and was surprised that he had even noticed.

"Oh… I was just wondering, have you been here before?" He resembled the cancer patient that had come in about two weeks ago. But that wasn't possible, he should be recovering from a surgery or something. Or bed ridden from the sickness.

"Yeah."

"He had come to see Dr. Smith," Gon chimed in.

"Dr. Smith? Oh, do you know where he is by chance? Because I have some papers for him that he dropped when he left yesterday."

"We were just about to go see him, actually." Kurapika cut in, "We were just stopping by to grab some files for him."

"Oh that's great! I'll get those papers for you and you can be on your way," She said.

Those papers had looked important. It's a good thing these nice young men will be able to get them to him.

Wow she's really trusting of people.

So she just goes around and gives important documents to random people.

Good, a lead that will eventually get me to the Phantom Brigade member.

"Here you go."

"Thank you. We'll get this to him right away."  
________________________________________

They didn't open the folder she had given them until they had reached the apartment.

"Alright, let's see what we have here." Kurapika opened the folder and pulled out the contents. There were two patient files, a few restaurant to go menu, a notepad. The notepad looked brand new except the first page had been ripped off.

"Nothing. We've got nothing." Kurapika sighed.

"But, don't we have the notepad?" Gon asked innocently. "Maybe if we knew what that first page said we would know where he is."

"Well of course idiot! The problem is that we don't- Oh wait…" Killua ran to the white door on the left and began throwing things about his room. "Where the hell did it go…" was   
heard before a satisfied, "Ah-ha!" was triumphantly shouted.

Killua walked out of his room holding a pencil out in front of him like it was the Holy Grail.

"A pencil?" Kurapika questioned. A tone of doubt infiltrating his voice.

"Give me the notepad," Killua said and held out his hand. He was rewarded with the stack of paper. Holding the pencil sideways, the shaded the whole page lightly with graphite.

"What are you doing?"

"You don't get it, Kurapika? He's going to shade the last page and if the doctor wrote anything down hard enough then the indent won't be colored and we can see what he wrote. It's like reverse writing." Gon stated like it was the most obvious thing in the whole world.

But, how did Gon figure this out before me. I really need to step up my game.

"I got it!" Killua showed the colored page to the two people in front of him. It read,

Midnight  
Tomorrow  
Behind the hospital.

"We've got ourselves a lead."


	12. Chapter 12

It was half an hour before midnight. The night air was chilled. No stars could be seen in the dark sky but the moon shone weakly. Three boys made their way slowly down the dimly lit sidewalk. It was twenty minutes till midnight and the hospital was just around the corner. They stopped to cloak themselves in Zetsu.

Each of them were silently hoping that the note wasn't a dead end. If the doctor had written that note even two days ago they would be too late. Kurapika nodded and they set off silently, like shadows.

They spread out so that they would be able to stop all escape routes. Kurapika took the left side, Gon the right, and Killua from behind. They each found a hiding spot and readied themselves for a wait.

Kurapika was crouching behind a large, dark green dumpster in the pitch black alley. He hid his nose with his sleeve to stifle the rancid smell of week old food. But, he did not lose focus of the task at hand. Every person who passed by the hospital alley was a suspect. He waited patiently for the spider to fall into his own web. He would avenge his brethren.  
Gon was unable to find a spot that provided enough cover in the alleyway, so he waited in the parking lot behind some larger cars. If someone entered the alleyway he would move over and wait next to it. The doctor would pay for what he did to Killua.

Killua, like Gon, had been unable to find sufficient cover behind the white walled hospital. So, he sat atop the building behind it and waited in the cool breeze. Killua scanned the darkness and found no change. An eye for an eye. Harold Smith was on his hit list, and he would receive Killua's wrath.

A new presence alerted each of their senses as it entered the alley way. It was using Zetsu. It was doing a very bad job at it. The smell of drugs carried on the wind to Killua's nose. Of course he could smell the hospitals medicines and disinfectants right now, but this smell was different. This was the smell of the drugs that had coursed through his veins for over a week. Only this smell was less refined and stronger.

The figure was hooded by a dark jacket hoodie but his stature could not be concealed. He was much shorter than average, and incredibly scrawny. He was not the doctor, so he must be the person the doctor was meeting tonight.

Each of the hunters let a small breath of relief escape them. They had found the note just in time. Now all they had to do was wait for the doctor to show up and confront him.  
Gon had originally planned to wait for the doctor to arrive before he moved but he thought better of it now. If the person who just entered the alley chickened out or got nervous   
and left, Gon would have to intercept him. He just hoped the doctor would come in a different way.

He waited for the figure to venture deeper into the alley before darting over silently to the corner. He used the shadows of the trees that lined the sidewalk. The weak light of the moon deepened the darkness, providing better cover. He would wait here, invisible to the untrained eye.

The figure reached the back of the alley and waited with his back to the hospital. He tried to make out the time on his watch but grunted in frustration when he found it too dark to read the hands on the face. But Killua could make out the dark lines easily with his precise vision. It was 11:55. The doctor still had five minutes to arrive. Five more minutes Killua would have to wait. It was a good thing he was patient when it came to hunting his prey.

Finally, a second figure approached. This one was not using Zetsu. Instead, to conceal himself he wore a long tan trench coat with the collar pulled up. To top it all off he wore a black fedora to hide his features. This man entered the alley (to Gon's relief) on the side that Kurapika resided. This had to be the doctor.

The hunters waited anxiously as their prey entered their trap. The doctor's footsteps echoed ominously about the alley. Mice and rats reluctantly scurried away to let him pass and then returned immediately back to their garbage. The doctor seemed disgusted by the animals as his aura began to show signs of discomfort and disdain. His emotions and thoughts were easily read as he began to subconsciously radiate his emotions.

Kurapika and Gon moved in further seeing that everyone had arrived, and waited, barely concealed by the long-cast shadows. They listened closely as a conversation began between the two figures.

"Here's the money for this shipment." The doctor's voice spoke out with a hint of fear.

"Good. This is the shipment." This voice was uttered like a snake hisses. And it was quiet, like every word was an important secret not to be over heard by anyone.

The exchange was made. The doctor gave the unknown figure the money, and the figure gave him a large bag of leaves.

"Listen. I have to go somewhere else. Their looking for me here. We'll have to find another-"

Kurapika, having heard enough, jumped from his hiding spot and attacked the unknown figure with his twin wooden swords. The figure blocked with a long knife that had seemed to come from nowhere. They were locked into combat, slashing and blocking and stabbing. But the fight was over quickly when Kurapika flipped the knife right from the man's hands.

In the time that Kurapika had engaged in battle the other two hunters had confronted the doctor, who had been attempting to escape the alley. Gon jumped into the doctor's path first. The doctor drew out his throwing knives and readied himself, but before he could even flick his wrist something was beside him. He turned and found his jaw in contact with a pale fist.

Killua punched him hard against the right side of his face. He even let a satisfactory smile seep into his features when he felt a few teeth give way to his curled fingers. A maniacal feeling spread through his body as his blood lust grew. But before it reached his mind he glimpsed Gon out of the corner of his eye. It was a glimpse of reason. It reminded him that he was not on an assignment from his parents, that's not what he was here for.

He looked to the doctor who was trying to stand and shouted out, "That, was for Gon!"

The doctor was suddenly confronted by another problem. An uppercut again to his jaw. At first there was another bout of blinding pain but he then lost his awareness and fell into unconsciousness. But the inflictor of his pain this time was not the assassin boy. No, this time it was the boy with spiky black hair.

"And that, was for Killua." He said, even spiting in his direction. (Which failed terribly because he didn't spit hard enough and most of it landed on his chin, earning a chuckle from Killua)

As he wiped his chin with his hand he called to Kurapika, who had his wooden sword at the other man's throat.

"This is not a Phantom brigade member." Kurapika called back, frustration clear in his tone.

It was a good thing he used his swords instead of his chains. Gon thought. Or he would be dead.

Well now we've got the doctor. What to do next? Killua pondered.


	13. Chapter 13

The man that had been supplying the doctor with drugs turned out to be working for the Phantom Brigade member that Kurapika had been pursuing. Like a coward he gave out all the information that Kurapika needed to find the member.

The hunter association was called and it turns out that Doctor Harold Smith had a bounty over his head. Killua and Gon were rewarded for their efforts in finding and apprehending the doctor. After everything had cooled down and the questioning ended, the boys were allowed to go home.

"Hey Gon, Killua, I'm going to head out."

"Already?" Gon asked.

"Yeah, the longer I wait the harder it will be to find him with the new information I've got."

"Oh," Gon sighed. "Well it was nice to see you again. Catching bad guys just like old times." Kurapika nodded and bid them farewell. Gon and Killua waved goodbye and he was gone.

A few people had come by the hospital to see what all the commotion was about but past the hospital the streets were empty, seeing as it was one in the morning. The night air seemed a bit cooler now and the moon shone a bit brighter. A few stars poked through the blanket of darkness and sparkled in the sky.

The two boys walked back to the apartment together in companionable silence. They were side by side, hands touching, but not quite holding. Relief and confidence were obvious in the way they walked. Neither of them really felt tired as adrenaline still flooded their systems so they were taking the long way home to cool down.

Gon felt like he would never cool down. He could run around the world and back and still feel exactly the same if Killua was at his side. He didn't really want to go back home just so that he could lay awake in the darkness until the sun came up.

"Let's go to the park." He said suddenly. He looked at Killua for confirmation and received it when he nodded his head. They took a few different turns and were on their way to the park.

Killua felt the same as Gon, restless. He didn't want to go home and do nothing. He wanted to hang out with Gon now that the mission was finished. Maybe they would go on a new mission sometime soon. Killua looked up to the sky and was surprised to find that the stars had practically multiplied. More and more were popping up.

Before he knew it they were at the park. They stopped by the water fountain and looked into the perfectly still water. Their reflections stared back at them.

Tousled sliver hair and deep blue eyes. Pale skin and dark clothing. Unseen scars and hidden secrets. Emotions locked away in a heart of ice that was slowly melting. Killua.  
Spiky black hair and clear brown eyes. Tanned skin and green clothing. Fierce loyalty and childish innocence. A person slowly learning to adapt to a new emotion that he was finally giving in to. Gon.

They stepped away from the fountain and walked around a bit more. They found themselves at a bench on the top of a hill under a tree, overlooking a small pond that reflected the night sky. They sat together on the wooden bench. Each had an arm over the other, after all it was cold outside.

They sat there for a long time just looking out over the park. They watched the stars in the sky as they shone with a new found brilliance. When they looked to the pond they saw the same thing but slightly distorted.

They didn't leave. They stayed there and watched the sun slowly come over the horizon of buildings, turning the sky beautiful colors. First, the sun changed the night sky from dark blue to a pale azure. Then all of the colors of dawn emerged. Pale orange, light purple, faint red.

When the sun was finally all the way over the horizon, the boys were still there. The one with silver hair had found himself with a sleeping companion on his shoulder. He had fallen asleep in the soft warmth of his shoulder and the other boy could not bring himself to disturb him. So, he watched in silence as nature awoke and fluffy white clouds filled the sky.

The day would be beautiful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE END  
> Thanks for reading you guys! I really appreciate it! :)  
> ~Rennwolf


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